Chain Breaker

If you’ve got pain, He’s a pain taker
If you feel lost, He’s a way maker
If you need freedom, saving, He’s a prison-shaking Savior
If you’ve got chains, He’s a chain breaker.
-Zach Williams, Chain Breaker

Every Thursday night that I’m not out of town for work, I get the opportunity to volunteer in the senior high ministry at my church.  And every week when I walk out of that room I feel overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude, awe and wonder.

Gratitude that I get to be a small part in these young adult’s lives, at such an impressionable and vulnerable age.  The things they are learning about themselves and the world right now, are what will shape their self-image and sense of self-worth for life.

I am in awe that God still chooses to use me, despite all that I have been through and all the things I have done wrong in my life.

And I am in wonder at the ways He works miraculously through me, my story, and my experiences.

This past week was particularly astounding.  The message was on experiencing Freedom, which is one of my five core passions in life, and one of the things I believe God has specifically created me for.

As the presenter told a story about a time in his life that he lived with the fear and bondage of what other people thought of him, and how he was set free from that, the students were instructed to bind their wrists in zip ties and think about things that are keeping them from freedom in their own lives. Whether that be bitterness, fear, pride, a relationship, a habit, an addiction…. As he wrapped up, he read a list of examples that other high school students had written down about some of the things they felt they were in bondage to:

Worrying about the future
If I’m honest, no one will forgive me or love me.
Eventually God will say enough is enough.
I’ll never be good enough
[the thought that] Forgiving someone means what they did is ok
I’m super scared people won’t approve of me
I’m afraid I’m not smart enough
I’m afraid I’ve done too much
I’m afraid everyone will stop loving me
[I feel like] I have to do everything on my own because if I let people help, they will end up hurting me even more.

As he read, I cried.  A couple of them really hit home for me because they were thoughts I had had myself at one point in my life.  I was also thinking about how universal those thoughts are; certainly every student in the room could relate to one, or any number of, the things on that list.

The students sat with their hands locked together as he finished and the worship band began to play “Break Every Chain” by Tasha Cobbs.  The lyrics go, “There is power in the name of Jesus, to break every chain, break every chain, break every chain.”  When they were ready, they could walk to the back of the room where we leaders were standing with scissors to physically free them from their bondage of the zip tie, and pray for them to be released of their spiritual or emotional enslavement, if they wished.

One-by-one wrist-bound students got up and made their way to the back of the room.  One girl asked me to pray for her.  She told me she keeps asking God to send good people in her life, but then every time He does she pushes the person away and sabotages the relationship.  I asked her if she thought that was based on fears from her past, from other people she got close to who hurt, or abandoned or betrayed her.  She said yes.  So I prayed for her to be free of that past hurt, and to have an open heart and mind to receive these new, good people God was sending her.

As she walked away and I started singing along with the lyrics, I was flooded with the emotion of the moment. What an incredible metaphor happening all around me that I was getting to participate in.  It occurred to me that the ONLY reason I could stand at the back of the room and cut the ties of bondage off of these students was because I had already experienced that yoke-destroying freedom for myself!  By no means does that mean I’m perfect, or that I have arrived, but I am no longer bound. I am free, forgiven, redeemed, whole, made righteous and holy.

It’s in this state – and ONLY in this state – I am able to help others walk into freedom for themselves.

Streams of thankfulness poured from my eyes as I stood in amazement of a God who chooses me, who loves me, who sees me, and who breaks my every chain.