4 Things You Need to Know Before You Start Blogging

pexels-photo.jpgHave you ever thought about starting a blog?

I toyed with the idea once or twice myself before I finally did. As much as I love to write, I hate blogs.  Everything about them.  My thoughts are, who has time to read blogs? …much less keep up with writing one?  AmIRight?

Plus, there are just so many out there already!  As of 2013, there were 152 million blogs on the internet. [1]  As of 2:46pm on Feb 17th, 2017 there had already been 2.9 million blog posts posted THAT DAY alone.[2]

I figured if I did ever start one, I would make it about two months and never remember to post again.  Fizzle out. Like so many other bloggers do. In fact, research shows the average blog is dead after a mere 100 days.

So I never started one. Until I did.  Sunday was the two year anniversary of my first blog post.

So, why did I start one?

Because in one conversation with my mentor, she told me if I ever wanted to get a book contract with a publisher, I needed this thing called a platform, and blogging was generally a good way to start building one of those.

So, Feb 19th, 2015, I opened a WordPress account and copy/pasted something I’d already written as a facebook post as my first blog entry.  (I know, I totally cheated.)

But since that first post, I’ve learned a few things.  Here’s what I want you to know, that I wish I had known then:

  1. Know that blogging is not for the faint of heart. But it’s worth it.

Baring your soul for the whole world to see is not easy – even for us extroverts.

There’s a Special Thanks page in the back of my book and my editor’s name is first on the list.  This is part of what I wrote to her: Turning over a first book (or maybe any book? I don’t know yet) for editing is kind of like tearing open your soul and inviting someone to walk inside.  It’s exposing the most intimate parts of your inner self and trusting that person not to return pieces of you shattered and bloody.

It’s the same with blogging.

There are some posts I write that are so vulnerable I want to throw up after I hit the “publish” button.  I don’t know if my words and my heart will be received appropriately.  What if the message I was trying to convey is misinterpreted?  Or what if I just sound stupid, or whiny, or self-centered, or entitled….

I vividly remember feeling this way about a post I wrote regarding race relations during some of the tense riots that happened over the last few years.  (You can read that post here: www.RachelDawnWrites.com/blog/Color-blinded)

I have been super fortunate to this point that I haven’t gotten any extremely negative, critical or harsh comments about anything I’ve written.  But I know as my platform grows, it’s inevitable.

.facebook_1460409929320I heard a speaker at a writing conference say, “When you’re marketing anything in life – whether it’s chicken sandwiches or books – there is a 1% jerk factor in the world.  One percent of people who are just negative and critical for the sake of being negative and critical.  It doesn’t have anything to do with you.  You could offer the best thing in the world, that 99 other people love, but this 1 person will find something wrong with it and a reason to complain.”  Expect it, Accept it, Move on. It’s not you, it’s them.

Your message will resonate with some people and not with others, and that’s ok.  You can get really derailed really fast if you try pleasing everyone with every post.  That’s just not reality.

Pick you niche, hone your voice, find your audience, and write meaningful stuff for them.  Period.

Any self-doubt, second-guessing, fear, uncertainty or criticism is totally worth it when someone responds to something you’ve written with, “me too”, “that’s exactly how I feel”, “I thought I was alone”.

  1. Know that it sucks. No one will read it (at first). You will want to quit.

I understand that’s 3 things in one bullet point, but they are all the same.

Recently a photographer friend of mine posted: “Being a [creative] entrepreneur is just waves of ‘I just want to quit’, ‘this is crap’, ‘I’m deleting social media’, and occasionally, ‘Man, I was really made to do this.’”

When you spend hours working on one post, upload it, and keep refreshing your wordpress stats every 15 mins only to see that only 6 people look at it and no one comments….. you kiiiind of feel like throwing in the towel.

What’s the point of writing, of investing your time and emotional/mental energy, if no one even cares?

I don’t have an answer to this one.  Because I found myself asking this very same question this week.  After two years of blogging I have 33 “subscribers” to my blog.  Even some of my most loyal readers, who tell me they love every post I write, aren’t subscribed and they don’t regularly share my posts with their networks.  So I get it, it’s really discouraging.

But I’m learning there are ways you can hone your voice and your craft to increase those numbers, to increase your effectiveness.

I came across some incredible free training just this week that’s helping me with streamlining my posts to get more traction and shares.  Ruth Surkamp founder of Elite Blogging Academy, author of “How to Blog for Profit: Without Selling Your Soul”, is offering this free series online right now. Check it out: https://ruthsoukup.leadpages.co/blogging-made-simple-2017-video-1/?inf_contact_key=bd1f84da626e39d8eb703404e962fc6161c1d1a4683a3ab7fb02ce596d2ae12f

I got tons of practical, immediately applicable tips from the very first video.  I completely restructured this post I had already started after watching it and learning what I did.  Thank you for that Ruth!

  1. Know WHY you are blogging.

The quickest way to get frustrated and stop blogging is if you start a blog before you know why you are starting a blog.  There are definitely tips and tricks and skills you can learn to blog more effectively, depending on what your goals are.  But if you don’t know what your goals are….. you can’t hit them.

Ask yourself, why are you blogging?  Is it just for fun?  Are you just blogging for yourself, a literal personal web-log or diary?  Are you blogging to tell stories to your close family and friends?  Are you trying to use blogging as a source of income?  Are you trying to expand your network/platform/reach/tribe/influence – whatever you want to call it – to get your voice and your message out there?  Are you trying to make an impact?  Change people’s lives?  Raise awareness?  Be an expert?  Start a movement?

Even if it’s just to make people laugh or to feel inspired, you need to ask yourself:  What is your purpose in blogging?

I came face to face with this question shortly after I launched my blog and my online platform, when Facebook asked me “What business am I in?”  I stared at the blank box with the blinking cursor in it for a solid half hour while I asked myself, why am I doing this anyway?  I came up with a pretty solid answer I shared in this post here: www.RachelDawnWrites.com/blog/what-business-am-i-in.

What it boiled down to in 160 characters or less was:

“I am in the business of restoring hope, igniting dreams, inspiring change, and leading people toward freedom.”

And out of that whole exercise came my business tagline, “Restoring Hope, Igniting Dreams”.

That’s why I blog.  That’s why I study how and work to increase my platform.  Because the more people my blogs can reach, the more people’s lives I can impact and influence for the better.  Which is literally the reason I was created in the first place.

Blogging helps me move in the direction of my purpose.  That’s a good investment of time and energy.

You need to ask yourself if it is for you.

  1. Know You Have Something Worth Saying.

Who was I to start a blog?  What did I have to say that people would be interested in and that hadn’t already been said a thousand times.  Who would want to read it?  How would I stand out from all the others?  Those were some of the questions I wrestled with that February two years ago.

counter (2)Reading all the overwhelming stats about how saturated the world of blogging is and thinking about all the work, potential roadblocks, discouragements and frustrations could easily make you throw up your hands and decide blogging isn’t worth it at all.

Or maybe you’re stuck in that place I was asking, “Who am I to do this?”

This week I taught the high school service at my church.  We are in the midst of an all-church journey on identity, wherein we are identifying the lies and labels in our lives – who we think we are or who the world says we are – and replacing those with the Truth of who God says we are.

Part of the lesson this week was the story of Moses and his own identity crisis.  Born a Hebrew slave, raised an Egyptian Prince, on the run after committing murder, Moses found himself pondering life as a sheepherder in the country.  When seemingly out of nowhere, God called him to be the hero of the story; to lead the people of Isreal out of slavery in Egypt.  His response to God was similar to mine when God told me to write a book (and subsequently start a blog), “Who am I, Lord?  Who am I to be the hero or lead a people?”

God’s response was simple: It doesn’t matter who you are, Moses, what matters is Who is with you and Who is sending you.  He told Moses to go into Egypt and tell people “I Am” (Yahweh) has sent me.  That’s all the credibility and power Moses needed.

You were created for a purpose. Just like I was. Just like Moses was. Uniquely. There are 522d171b57ab75f123db71e966e47bfaseeds planted inside of you, talents and abilities, to help you succeed in that purpose.  Writing – sharing your thoughts through written words – may very well be a part of that.

Lysa Terkeurst says this in her book “Uninvited”: “Remember that there is an abundant need in this word for your contributions….. your thoughts and words and artistic expressions…. Your exact brand of beautiful.”

Other people might have similar things to say, but there is only one you.  You are the only person with your story, your experiences, your worldview, your voice.

Don’t let your doubts, fears, or insecurities stop you from doing what you were created to do.

What if, instead of agreeing to the mission, Moses had told God, “There are so many other Hebrew men more qualified for this than me, I’m out.”

Would the Isrealites still be in slavery today?  Would thousands of lives be entirely different?  Maybe.  Likely not.  Likely, God still would have accomplished His mission, but He would have used someone else to get it done.  He could have found someone else to stand up to Pharoah and say, “Let my people go.” But the one life that certainly would have been different would have been Moses’.  He would have lived out his days as a sheepherder, which was not what he was created to do.

If you decide not to let those words that are burning inside you get out, could God still get that message out through someone else?  Of course.  But then you won’t be living out what you were created to do either.  And what kind of living is that?

So, blogging might be hard and it might suck and maybe you’ll never have more than 30 readers, and most of the time you’ll feel like giving up, but if it’s part of what you were created to do, you must.

And when you feel like quitting, just remember why you are doing it, Who sent you, and that you have something worth saying.

 

 

[1] http://www.patrickkphillips.com/blogging/research-the-average-blog-lifespan-isnt-very-long/

[2] www.Worldometers.info/blogs

A Billion Dollar Lesson In Disobedience

“When I talk to you….listen.” – God

So we all have lessons to learn in life, but we don’t always learn our lessons the first time, or the second time, or the easy way.  

I was recently reminded of an important lesson – again – and I’m pretty sure I won’t be forgetting it this time.

Most people have those, “if only I had thought of that…” moments in life, after the fact.  Let me tell you about mine.

Rachel, (it’s her blog…she’s my wife….on with my story) started traveling for work quite a few years ago, and would end up in questionable parts of town in different cities around North America.  It bothered me a lot more than it bothered her, I didn’t like the idea of her being in places like that with me 1,000 miles away.  One night while she was away, I came up with a great app idea that would color-code a map to show where “safe”/”unsafe” parts of town were in any given city.  I shared the idea with her and she agreed it was cool and would be useful.

Unfortunately for me, I allowed seemingly large obstacles stop me from acting on the idea. Thoughts like, “I don’t know how to make apps!?” And “Surely someone else has already come up with/done this.” Or “Where would I even start?” “How much will it cost?”  

I say seemingly large obstacles, because looking back NONE of those should have stopped me.  I mean, that is what entrepreneurs do – they find a way to push through; push through what they want to do and do what they need to do, push through the doubts about themselves, the doubts of others and sometimes (maybe even most times) the doubts of logic – to create something truly special.
I had always been entrepreneurial at heart and knew that’s eventually what I wanted to be full-time.

About a year ago, we attended a entrepreneurship conference at our church.  At that conference a contest was held, business ideas were pitched and a small cash prize was awarded to the winner.  

Crazy thing, the winner of the contest that day had “my” app idea!  

I was bummed personally but it’s not like I ever did much with the idea except tell my wife, kick it around an hour here or there, then allow procrastination and inaction take over.

At the conference, I actually went up and congratulated the winner and thanked him for acting on the idea to make happen.
It was motivating to me although frustrating at the same time. That experience confirmed in me that I am smart and I can come up with great ideas – I just need to follow through.

A year later, our church’s Start-Up Accelerator program was “graduating” one class of new businesses, and taking applications/pitches for the next class. They were making an announcement about the success of the previous class. Turns out, the guy who won that “little” contest at the conference was also invited into the Accelerator. He had just pitched the idea at “DEMO day”, to investors from all over the world, and was told the idea is worth potentially a BILLION dollars.  That’s with a B and heck of a lot of zeros following it.  

I immediately felt like I got punched in the gut. My face probably went pale, and I thought I would puke right there in the pew.  

What had I done?  Or rather NOT done!  I failed my wife, my family, and future generations and so many others.  The voice in my head said, “way to go Barry another opportunity at greatness that you let pass by, due to procrastination.”  

For the next couple hours I had myself quite a grand self-pity party. I had moments of clarity and motivation, but mainly pity.  I was miserable to my wife and anyone unfortunate enough to be around me.

Then I began writing this because God started talking to me again and this time I chose to listen.
I want to share my revelation with you.

You see “I” didn’t have that idea.  He had that idea, and planted it inside me, He gave me an opportunity.  

God will get His ideas done with or without you but He wants you to be a part of them, to bless you, but you have to listen.  

That app idea was worth a Billion dollars and yes, I could have/should have been a part of it.  But it wasn’t about me making money, it wasn’t even about me at all.

Follow me here: God needed a way to route some money (He always works through people to get things done on earth). Earlier this year, our church announced a campaign to fund some incredible things they feel God calling them to do in our city, around our country and around the world. From tackling poverty in the inner city, launching new sites, building infrastructure for impoverished and orphaned children in third world countries, rescuing and rehabilitating girls out of sex slavery… amazing, world-changing initiatives. It will take HUNDREDS of MILLIONS of dollars to see all those things through to fruition. God’s end goal was getting money into my church.

Yes, personal financial gain would have been a bi-product of my obedience. But God knew what I would turn around and do with that money.

He was providing my church with a patron, in possession of God’s idea, to turn around and bless them and therefore use those resources to serve God and reach others.  

How selfish and ignorant of me to first ignore God, but then second, think it was about me.  

Some of you may be reading this saying, so what! Someone thought of something you thought of. They made it happen and you were lazy and didn’t do it.  Happens all the time, How’s that God? 

Think about it, in all the world of 6 billion people, two people in the same city, at the same church, have the same idea that is worth an insane amount of money within a relatively short amount of time?  

One listened, the other didn’t. But God still made it happen. Those resources will still flow and His kingdom will grow and prosper because of it.

I haven’t talked to the guy who made it happen since that day at the conference. Good for him for listening to God and making it happen.

I mentioned he had a cool story behind it and funny enough it is similar to how I thought of the idea initially.  But his story is even cooler once you learn what he overcame to beat those obstacles and put himself in a position to end up where he has. And now he will be rightfully blessed for that obedience and hard work.  

I repented for my disobedience and asked for forgiveness. I also asked God not to give up on me and to continue to pursue me and talk to me.

My hope and prayer is that He chooses to bless me with more opportunities for greatness to serve Him and that when He does, I will be BRAVE enough, diligent enough, and in close enough relationship with my Dad that I hear His voice and without hesitation answer, “YES!” Then joyously run toward whatever idea, adventure, life, and calling He has in store for me.

I believe He will answer my prayer.  I’ll be listening for Him that’s for sure.  

– Guest Blog by Barry Neuberger

Barry is an avid outdoorsman, semi-professional gourmet chef, and former collegiate club soccer star. He currently runs multiple businesses and always thinking of the next. He lives in Cincinnati with his wife Rachel and their full house of animals.

UPDATE: This blog was first posted as a “trillion dollar lesson” because that was the figure used from stage at church, but Barry decided that sounded a bit unbelievable and possibly the speaker misspoke. A billion dollar figure is much more realistic and believable for this kind of idea.

God is in the Restoration Business

He breathes life into lifeless places.

It doesn’t matter if it’s a relationship, your health, your emotions, your dreams….

He brings dry bones out of the grave and wraps them in flesh once more.

He Restores the years you lost, the love you lost, the friends you lost, the faith you lost, the dreams you lost, the opportunities you lost.   Over and above what we can even think of or imagine.

He makes all things new, again.

If you let Him.

If something in your life needs total restoration, read these promises below and be encouraged.

He CAN do it.
He HAS done it for others (including me).
He WANTS to do it for you.
“Behold, I am the Lord, the God of all flesh. Is anything too hard for me?”  (Jeremiah 32:27, ESV)

“Be glad, O children of Zion, and rejoice in the Lord your God, for he has given the early rain for your vindication; he has poured down for you abundant rain, the early and the latter rain, as before.The threshing floors shall be full of grain; the vats shall overflow with wine and oil. I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten, the hopper, the destroyer, and the cutter, my great army, which I sent among you. You shall eat in plenty and be satisfied, and praise the name of the Lord your God, who has dealt wondrously with you.”  (Joel 2:23-26, ESV)

“See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”  (Isaiah 43:19)

“Have mercy on me, O God, according to your steadfast love; according to your abundant mercy blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity, and cleanse me from my sin! Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being, and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart. Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Let me hear joy and gladness; let the bones that you have broken rejoice. Hide your face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from your presence, and take not your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold me with a willing spirit.”  (Psalm 51:1-2, 6-12, ESV)

“Return to your fortress, O prisoners of hope; even now I announce that I will restore twice as much to you.”  (Zechariah 9:12, NIV)

GOD IS IN (2)

What Business AM I in??!

A few weeks ago, Facebook released a promotional tool for “business pages” housed on their site. It’s a video that starts with, “we are in the business of….” And gives a very brief overview/description of your business.  Like a 15 second mini-commercial.


I followed the link to create my own for my writer/speaker page.  Facebook did all the work for me, I just had to fill in the blanks and make my selections and it would spit out a professional marketing tool.  I picked all my favorite pictures and clicked “next”, then the tagline pops up: “We are in the business of…..”  I sat staring at the blinking cursor in the empty text box.

What business AM I in?

Why does this page exist?

What IS the point of all this?

Why am I doing this?
And how do I even begin to put that into 160 characters or less?!!

You want me to summarize my life’s purpose in less than a dozen words?!

I literally closed the window and didn’t look at it again for two weeks.
It ate at me, that I couldn’t articulate why I do what I do, and how to explain it to someone – simply. 

I started to meditate on the reasons why I write, why I share vulnerable parts of my life and my story, why building my platform on social media even matters…. I started to really think about all of it.
I thought back to a question I had asked myself about a year ago, “Rachel, what are you passionate about?”.  At that time, I made a list and that list helped me to put things into perspective.  I was able to prioritize my time/energy/focus on the things that really matter to me, and put aside things that I was mildly interested in, or that were just eating up my time.   

A few key words started to float to the surface of my mind: Hope, Inspiration, Dreams, Belief, Freedom. 

Finally, I decided on this: “We are in the business of restoring hope, igniting dreams, inspiring change, and leading people toward freedom.” 

The video turned out absolutely delightful. (if you want to watch it: My Business Video)
I wished I could have gone into more detail about each of those items on there but I certainly can here:

Restoring hope
for the hopeless.
Because I once was.

Igniting dreams
for those who have forgotten how to dream, or lost the ability to believe in them.

Because I lived in that place, the place where everything I once dreamed about seemed too far out of reach, broken, ruined, and you don’t know how or where to begin again.

Inspiring change
I realize I cannot changing anybody. Ever. Period.
But by sharing my story of how my life has changed, I can help people see that change is possible, and achievable, and desirable and inspire them to seek change in their own lives.

Leading people to freedom.
Freedom?  Freedom.
Freedom from shame, freedom from fear, freedom from guilt, freedom from bondage, freedom from entitlement, freedom from their past hurts, failures and bad decisions. 
Woah.  That’s a big one.  A pretty tall order.  And it’s the one thing I’m most passionate about.  But can I really do that? 
No, I cannot make anyone free, I cannot give anyone freedom myself.  But, I can lead them to the Source of True Freedom, where I found my own.

If I achieve all or any one of these things, in the life of even one person who visits, likes, or follows my page, then it will have been successful in its purpose.

So what business am I in? 
I’m in the business of loving and encouraging people. I’m in the business of (trying my best) to show people the character and person of Jesus in real life, even if it’s over a computer screen.  I’m in the business of making myself vulnerable so people feel less alone about their own failures and shortcomings.  I’m in the business of extending grace, ’cause God knows I need my fair share!  I’m in the business of helping people live in the fullness and wholeness they were created so that they may identify and go after their own purpose.  I’m in the business of positioning them to see and believe that it’s possible – no matter what they’ve been through, or from where they are starting.  I’m in the messy human being business. 

But that’s WAY more than 160 characters ;)What business are you in?

Boys Don’t Like Girls Who Bite Their Nails

I wanted to call this blog, “Boys Don’t Like Girls Who Bite Their Nails – And Other Habit-Breaking Pieces of Wisdom” but that was a bit wordy, and my editor tells me I need to work on that.

For as long as I could remember, I was a nail-biter. Like the compulsive, bite-down-until-they-bleed kind. I know, it’s a dirty, disgusting habit. You don’t have to tell me. In middle school my older brother endowed me with the timeless wisdom, “Boys don’t like girls who bite their nails.” Thanks brother. Nice pep talk.

I had tried putting tape over them, bitter-tasting stuff on them, sheer will-power, and a myriad of other tricks to get myself to stop. But even if I held out for a while the first snag I had, the whole nail was chewed off to the bed again.

At 20 I was dirt-poor living on my own in Cincinnati, working as a receptionist, and still biting my nails. I remember driving home from work one Friday, a payday. I didn’t have any plans for the rainy night, and as I pulled off the exit gnawing on my bloody stump of a tomboy nail, I made a decision. I steered my car into a nail salon parking lot and decided to get a manicure. A real one. Not the press-on nails from Walmart for prom night type of manicure.

But first, let me explain what I mean by I was dirt poor:  I don’t mean, I was buying bargain “select” instead of “prime” cut meats at the grocery, I mean a shopping at the Dollar Store with my $10 grocery budget for the week after all my other expenses came out of my paycheck.  Any decent meals I had came from dates I went on and their subsequent leftovers. (Thank you bachelors of Cincinnati for sustaining me for 2 years.) So for me to invest FORTY DOLLARS into a French manicure, it might as well have been a million! But I knew if I paid such a high cost for my nails, I wouldn’t dare bite them off.

I felt a little silly, since I didn’t even know how to answer some of the questions they were asking me about my preferences at the salon. It hurt while they were working on me since my fingers were raw. And God love the technician who just had to make up the white lines halfway down my nail. But when they were finished, I looked down at my hands and felt so much pride. I felt ladylike and professional and fancy.

By the time the polish fully chipped off a couple weeks later, my nails had grown out enough they passed the end of my fingertips. I liked the way it looked and moreso, the way it made me feel. Accomplished, proud, sophisticated, mature, and clean.

I never bit my nails again to this day.

So here’s the point of telling you my nail biting story. Rarely do I get motivational-speaker-y, but over the last decade since breaking my first nasty habit, I’ve learned a few things about setting goals, breaking habits and getting things done I’d like to share with you.

I think we’re collectively beyond the naiveté that New Year’s Day is the only time to start over, set a new goal, or establish a new habit in life. You can do this any day of any month you want. But we are in that season of the year when more people are at least thinking of things in their life they would want to be different. So let’s set you up for success with 8 simple tips if you’re planning to go after any of them:

if you change nothing, nothing will change1. If you want your life to change, something in your life has to change.

I recently heard a speaker say this: “If 2016 is going to be different than 2015, then 2016 has to be different than 2015. You can’t make the same choices and decisions in 2016 and expect your life to be different come 2017.” Period.

 

2. You value what costs you something. The greater the sacrifice for a change, the more likely it is to be permanent.

The first time I went to a gym with any consistency is when I was in another very tight spot financially, planning my wedding. I couldn’t afford a gym membership, but wanted to tone up before my big day. A local gym offered a 21 day trial membership that required a $60 good- faith deposit. If you didn’t come to the gym at least 3 days a week during your trial, they kept the money. So I wrote them a check that I didn’t have the money to cash and you better believe my ass was in that gym every day the doors were open.

3. Be specific with your goals.

Nothing says, “nothing is going to get accomplished” like vague, immeasurable goals. Rather than saying, “Lose weight” How much weight do you want to lose and by what date? Or, “I want to become a better person” make it specific like this:

THIS YEAR:

A bad habit I’m going to break:

A new skill I will learn:

A person I hope to be more like:

A good deed I’m going to do:

A place I will visit:

A book I will read:

A letter I’m going to write:

A food I’m going to try:

And set a deadline for each of them.

4. Write. It. down.

It’s ridiculous the amount of data, studies and articles that irrefutably confirm people who physically write out their goals are guaranteed more likely to accomplish them than those who don’t. (http://sidsavara.com/personal-productivity/why-3-of-harvard-mbas-make-ten-times-as-much-as-the-other-97-combined)

Stop being lazy. Stop thinking you’ll beat the statistics. Just write them down.

5. Bad habits MUST be replaced with a good habit to last.

Biting my nails was replaced with regular, professional nail care. And when I couldn’t afford it, I still invested the time and energy to put polish on my own nails so as not to let myself slip back into my old habits.

Kicking soda? Replace it water, ounce for ounce.

You’re fasting from Facebook/Social Media in January? Great. What are you going to do with that time you now have available? Because if you just replace it with browsing other internet sites, you’re not any better off without Facebook. And, even if you have the willpower to make it through your fast period, you will revert right back to your old Facebook habit as soon as it’s over.

How about investing that time into reading a book on self-development or relationships, or playing an educational game with your kids?when you feel like quitting

6. KNOW YOURSELF.

You have to know what works for you and what doesn’t, what motivates you and what keeps you accountable. Things that work for other people might not work the same for you.

I know my natural tendency is to want to come in after a long day of work and just veg out, watch TV, do nothing. But, I learned that if I do that I will be too drained to be productive after. So if I want to get a workout or some reading in that night, I know for me, I have to do those things first.  Then let myself relax with a TV show as a reward. That motivates me. That works for me. And it’s something I can stick to because of my task-oriented personality. That might not work for you. Maybe you need accountability partners. Or a physical checklist.  But you’ve got to figure what does motivate you and keep you accountable and start implementing it NOW.

(PS, I read a book that taught me this lesson, it’s called, “Eat That Frog: 21 Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time”.  Buy it here:

Eat That Frog!: 21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time)

7. Stop lying to yourself, and the people in your life. SAYING IT

This goes along with #6. Nothing is of more frustration than people who are always setting new goals and never finding a way to keep themselves accountable to them. It’s ok to miss a goal and re-set it, but setting a new weight loss goal every tomorrow, while you finish off that donut or late night pizza is only kidding yourself. And truthfully, hurting your self-image. Not to mention, breaking down the trust of the people in your life. (But that’s a whole other conversation)

You’re never going to achieve ANY goal that you don’t have a daily, viable plan to walk out. Which leads us to #8.

8.Make a daily plan. You May Have To(5)

Creating new habits and accomplishing goals and dreams is only EVER accomplished by consistent, daily effort. You’re not going to lose 30 lbs before Summer by working out 2 hours a day one week, taking three weeks off, working out 3 hours one day, taking four days off…. But if you show up for 15-30 minutes a day, every day, you can.

Did you know if you read for 15 minutes a day for a whole year, that’s over 91 HOURS of reading?!  If the average book takes 5 solid hours to read, that’s 18 books in a year!  Even if a book takes you twice as long, that’s 9 books a year. A lot can change in your life by reading 9 books in an area you want to grow in.

If you want to publish that book, you’ve got to write every day. Even if it’s just a sentence or a paragraph.

If your goal is growing your relationship with God, you’ve got to show up and invest in that relationship by diving into the Word and praying every day.

If you want to save up to buy that [new house, new car, whatever], you’ve got to make a decision with your money every day, by the things you don’t let yourself spend on.

To close, I’ll leave you with the best quote I saw this year to keep in mind when setting a New Year’s – or any – Resolution:

fast forward

Let’s all be watchful of spending time setting and going after goals that don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. Sit down and think about what you even want your life to be about, what you want it to look like, what legacy you want to leave after it’s over.  Only then can you map out the goals and steps you need to get there.

Slow down to speed up.